“We don’t sell dank.” (Reruns, part two.)

My eccentric neighborhood has some of the most unusual signs I’ve seen in a long while. Here is my latest sampling. The words are unchanged but the italics are all mine. This is from two signs hanging up at the Daljeet’s Boutique. “No photos. No brats. No cellphones. no restroom so don’t ask. No loitering. This is not the place to eat your pizza, tie your shoes, smoke whatever you smoke or hang out.” Wow! Thanks, Daljeets, for making us all feel so cozy and welcome. And here’s another one, from the Cannabis Company: “We don’t see weed, bud, herb, dank, ganja, trees, or marijuana, and not even reefer. We don’t know where you can get some. Thanks for reading, and welcome to the Cannabis Company.” Well, that just about covers it, although they didn’t mention green bud or fat nuggs. And here’s one more sign, at Murio’s Trophy Room….

PVHS Reunion at MotoArt

Had a great time at the PVHS reunion. Still, I sensed I was growing older when my father, who drove me to the event, walked into the venue and asked if we were in the right place — and someone came up to him and asked if he was part of my graduation class! (My Dad just turned 84 years old.) It was great to catch up with everyone, and the venue looked like a bit of Soma right in the middle of Torrance, CA. It was part aircraft hangar, part art gallery, with bits of airplane rejiggered as furniture, sculpture, etc. Had to cut out earlier than expected after imbibing a mysterious libation known as a “Sea King.” Will not confirm or deny rumors that my parents drove me home from this event. http://cactuseaters.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default

Revenge of the microphone: Gary Shteyngart at Bookshop Santa Cruz

The microphone kept cutting out on Gary Shteyngart during his informal Q and A this week at Bookshop Santa Cruz. “Technology hates me, obviously,’’ the 38-year-old author and writing professor explained. The danged thing cut out three times. The world of gadgetry has every reason to despise Mr. Shteyngart. His new book, Super Sad True Love Story, is a funny, scathing response to shortened attention spans, the waning of books and reading, and the dominance of the digital world. In his new novel, reading is so marginalized that people think books smell like unwashed feet, and sometimes spray them to conceal their odor. Instead of reading, the people of SSTLS check in regularly with their apparat, a gizmo that, among other things, helps people log onto the Web, keep tabs on their health and broadcast their “hotness’’ rankings. To prepare himself for this book, Mr. Shteyngart broke down and got…

Reunion stripper

I found that link I was talking about in a previous entry. Could hardly believe this. She hired a stripper to go to a reunion in her place last year — and had the stripper wired with an earpiece so she could give offstage directions! I think the big running joke from this ‘documentary’ is that people always look so different at reunions anyhow (so how would someone really know if it wasn’t you?) This person grew up in the same town as me but technically it wasn’t the same high school (I think her high school was a temporary merging of my high school and a rival nearby high school, unless I’m mistaken …) Anyhow, looking forward to my own reunion — if any PVHS friends are out there reading this, would you let me know if you’re going? http://cactuseaters.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default

Politically correct used cars

In my new hometown, “used cars” is considered an offensive expression, and highly insensitive. In fact, there’s a car lot, two blocks away from me, in which the words “used cars” cannot be found anywhere on the parking lot or on the merchandise. Instead, there are little stickers on the windshields saying “this car has been previously loved.” http://cactuseaters.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default